Inside a Chinese Marriage


I remember how mom carried my little sister on her left arm, while she holds me firmly with her right hand. My eldest brother and sister is next to us holding a piece of her clothing as we all walked away from my father's house. My innocence that day made me an emotionless kid. I didn't know what to feel. I just go with the situation and live. 


Years passed and everything unfolded to me. I lived my childhood without a father. But it's not like those I've watched on tv. I don't feel any angst. My life doesn't feel like I am missing something or someone.  My mom raised us like as if we have a father figure in her. Her not mentioning her grief made us all stronger and wiser. I guess my mom raised us well. But I still want to know how. How all these years she was able to cope with all her struggles? Or what are her struggles? 



Last Friday, I attended a book launch where we're able to meet Miss Coylee Gamboa - one the authors of the book Broken Mirrors. There she discussed to us how she got inspired to write about Chinese marriage and culture through the story of Aurora Teo Mei Ling. Aurora is a woman who was married to an immigrant from China and strove to be a traditional Chinese wife. According to the author, through the book, we will be able to unearth secrets of Filipino-Chinese marriage. Where woman are usually silenced in the face of abuse and maltreatment is viewed as a virtue because of self-sacrifice and submission. 


As she reads through a chapter of the book, I felt like I was listening to my mom - sharing her story of deceit. I realized that Aurora's story is every women story of struggles and triumph. It is also a book of chances as it uplifts women of all races to break free from tradition and embrace their flaws and change their destiny. 


I remember a friend I know telling me about broken mirrors. When all pieces are put together, you may still see all cracks, but they are much stronger now.

If you want to read the book I am talking about, it is now available in all leading bookstores nationwide. You may also like their Facebook page for updates.

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